.........Im just missing you! ;(

How long do i keep this love for you
How long do i endure this pain that i feel inside
I guess,as long as you're in my mind
I admire you since I was in 1st yr.high school
I always stared at you
But you don't recognize
I disguised
Just to talk with you
But still,you don't know me
I remember the day's
When i was starring at you
While you're playing basketball
In the court of our school
The day's when my classmates teased me
Because of you
I hope someone could shatter
the glass
that isolates me from from you
Now that you're gone
You already leave the alma matter
Well,until now im thinking of you
and missing you
I can no more see you
I can no more hear you But i can still love you

UPCAT!!!!!

PLACE:college of engineering,UP diliman Q.C

Suck!the exam was... 80% difficult..somehow there is tagalog!haha!the math was really difiicult!I was always running out of time!I didn't answer the last which is abstract reasoning the easy one!coz there was no mins.left for me to answer it!really annoying!@3$%!Everytime the protoc wrote the time left.i was uneasy answering the subtest.I always felt nervous,my sweat was cold...I will never forget this day!especialy the time that i was in a hurry to finish the exam and to reach in a right time!Look,the language proficiency is 60 items,then I was still in no.30?if im not mistaken??then there were only 20 mins.left for me to answer the no.31-60!!!!panu b nmn kc...inaassure ko tlga ung answer...(woohhh..may pa assure2x k p mali rin nmn un.....)instead of concentrating on the subtest I always looked on the time if how many mins.left i could still spent.Then before we begun to answer the math,I heard my seatmate"Yes!math na!"maybe he's favorite subject is math.I felt envious huhu I told myself"buti pa cya 2wang-2wa pag math na,ako inis na inis!maybe he will pass... :("Then while i was walking to went home, I heard a group of students beside me..."Grabe!naka 3 scratch paper ako s math!"maybe,mening to say that student is a mathematician!smart in math!I felt envy again.i felt envy to them because im not good in math!!!wahh!im not smart!im dumb!!!
Im not hoping that i will pass the UPCAT..u know,I want to laugh in the midst of the crowd..because some of students are tall and big....yet their parents are still there to support them!ver supportive cla grabe!"anak don't forget to eat ur snack huh..." "eto towel para pag pinawisan ka..." "how's the exam?"
bwahahaha.....wahahahahah!ang sarap tlga tumawa!pinipigil ko n nga tawa ko nun eh...hayyy...wahahahaha!(insane!)

aug.3,2007 friday night

This is the moment that we've been waiting for a long..long time.Tomorrow is UPCAT na..I feel nervous.I always treat myself as a dumb!idiot!UP is a well-known university.Most of the UP students are intelligent!They are deserving....I don't belong to them.My parent's really insist me to study in UP.They're hoping that i will pass!i am dumb in math how much more in taking the UPCAT!!!!!!Im te only child that's y i understand them,they always push me even i can't make it.I always cry...Yes, I don't look in the bright side of the world!I know myself..I know where i belong..I guess,it' a miracle if i pass!I have nothing to do it's already here...all i have to do is trust in God..i should not believe in myself...Why do i always think negative ba?instead of thinking positive.But parang na va-vibes ko n ang outcome o resulta ng grade ko...

LETTER FOR MY DEAREST PARENT'S:
Pa,Ma,Im really sorry I can't make this....i can't ....I know i can't pass...I know myself...You will only get hurt in the end.How well do you know you're daugter??Pls.don't push me,i might fall...

I know it's very dramatic!but it's the truth..They don't know if im alright..I just always agree lng nmn eh..I always pretend....I always hide my feeling even they are my parent's.Yes,my parents are funny...friendly,approachable,but they are vigorous to me..ofcourse im the only one..unica ija"..I should respect them..agree lng ng agree.....or else,they will scold me and keep on nagging nanaman c mom.